Why do we say “brit mitzvah” instead of bar/bat mitzvah?
“Brit mitzvah,” meaning “covenant,” reflects a student reaching the age of responsibility for living a Jewish life. We honor students who identify as male or female and prefer the terms bar or bat mitzvah in our written and spoken communication.
When will I learn the date of my child’s brit mitzvah?
In the spring of fourth grade, you’ll complete a scheduling questionnaire. You’ll receive your child’s date that summer, before fifth grade, and attend a parent orientation during fifth grade. In sixth grade, your child will receive their Torah portion/parashah at a Kabbalat Torah ceremony.
What can I expect?
At Temple Beth-El, the brit mitzvah takes place during a Shabbat morning service. Your child will read from the Torah and deliver a speech based on their Torah portion. Other congregants may also read Torah during the service.
I know the date. Now what?
Attend Friday evening and Saturday morning services as often as possible so your family becomes comfortable with the prayers and service format. Formal preparation begins about six months before the ceremony, when you and your child will meet with Cantor Wallach to review the process.
What is the role of the clergy?
Cantor Wallach coordinates the brit mitzvah program and serves as your main contact for questions about the service, preparation, and attendance. She will meet with your family to begin the year of learning and explain the process.
The rabbi will meet with you and your child to discuss the meaning of brit mitzvah in Jewish tradition and your family’s life. He will also help your child understand their Torah portion and write their d’var Torah, a personal reflection on its meaning.
How will my child learn to chant Torah and Haftarah?
Your child will have weekly, 30-minute individual tutoring sessions—six with Larry Epstein, followed by sessions with Cantor Wallach. Some students may begin with Cantor Wallach, as Larry teaches online only.
How will my child learn the blessings?
Your child will learn the blessings during Hebrew School.
I heard there was a binder for parents. When can I get that?
Materials previously provided in binders are now available on our website, including documents, recordings, and forms. Click here to access the resources.
What is the tochnit mitzvah?
The tochnit mitzvah gives your child an opportunity to participate in our Tikkun Olam committees. Through this work, students learn the value of helping make the world a better place and develop a lifelong commitment to doing mitzvot.
Will my child have a brit mitzvah partner?
Temple Beth-El pairs students whenever possible. What began as a practical scheduling solution has fostered meaningful relationships between families, making it a valued tradition.
Can I have a photographer take pictures during my child’s brit mitzvah?
Many families arrange professional photos in the sanctuary before or after the ceremony, often on weekday afternoons or Friday mornings. Contact Executive Director Amy Rubin at least two weeks in advance to reserve a time.
Will there be a kiddush following my child’s brit mitzvah service?
Yes. Because the brit mitzvah takes place during a regular congregational service, families provide a shared kiddush of juice, challah, cake, or cookies for everyone attending.
Absolutely! Whether you’re planning a casual luncheon or a larger celebration, you may need to rent one or more social halls. Contact Executive Director Amy Rubin for availability and rental costs.
If you are interested in learning about the origins of the brit mitzvah, and how they’ve evolved over time, go to ReformJudaism.org.